Relax into Life's Flow ✨ Guided Sleep Meditation

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[00:00:53] Tonight as we fall asleep, we're going to address an issue that we likely all know pretty well. Overthinking. Insomnia's best friend, haha. There's a line from an old song, Take It Easy by The Eagles, that says, Don't let the sound of your own wheels drive you crazy.

[00:01:11] I heard it again recently and it struck my ears differently on that day. I never really thought much about that line before, but on that day it made me think about all those habitual thoughts that sometimes drag us down.

[00:01:24] We all have certain thought patterns that are so ingrained and habitual that it's easy to forget that they are just thoughts. They may or may not point to the truth. Lots of things we think we take as fact, but many times they deserve some questioning.

[00:01:41] Especially if your thoughts veer to the extreme ends and include the words always and never. Things like, it's always going to be this way or I'm never going to get there, keep us stuck in a fear-worry cycle that can be hard to shake loose.

[00:01:57] Billy and I wrote this episode as we sat drinking coffee talking about all the times we've had sleepless nights and how they really could have been solved by letting go of those tricky ruminating thoughts.

[00:02:11] When these looping thoughts strike us before bed, it can be especially difficult to stop ruminating. I used to really struggle with this. So much so that I had to make a rule for myself and my relationship. I told Billy no stressful conversations after 9pm.

[00:02:29] I also don't let myself read or watch anything I might find triggering after 9pm, and I stopped scrolling at or usually before that time too. Protecting your mental space before bed is something that cannot be underestimated.

[00:02:44] What we think about as we end our day can obviously impact the quality of our sleep. But there's also something uniquely special about the last things we think about before drifting off to sleep. As we are about to fall asleep, our brains are highly suggestible.

[00:03:01] You can choose to fill your mind with thoughts of things you want to create more of in your life – love, connection, abundance, health – or the things you're worried about. But if you choose to spend that precious window of time right before sleep consciously setting

[00:03:18] your mind up for positive thoughts while you rest, your sleep will be better and as a bonus, you may find that much of your life is getting better too. Connection before sleep is the easiest and best way I know to give your brain some love before bed.

[00:03:35] So let's get cozy and do that together now. Overthinking usually comes in the form of ruminating thoughts. Ruminating thoughts are repetitive, persistent, and often intrusive thoughts that typically focus on negative experiences, problems, or events.

[00:04:06] If these thoughts keep sleep at bay, it can become a vicious cycle where thoughts add to stress and stress makes it harder to sleep. Interrupting the cycle with mindful awareness is the first and often most crucial step in experiencing the deep relaxation effects of meditation.

[00:04:26] Take a moment to make any final adjustments to your posture. There's no rush as you settle into a comfortable and relaxed position. Maybe you make an adjustment to your shoulders or hips or pillow or cover, and that creates the need to make another adjustment elsewhere.

[00:04:48] The perfectionist may do this for a while because each little movement has some unintended consequence that requires another movement. At a certain point, when you feel relatively comfortable, simply become still and accept the posture as it is. Actions always have consequences, some intended and some unintended.

[00:05:14] When there is a fire, there is smoke. There's always a byproduct which may be released. Thoughts tend to flow together in this way as well. One thought leads to another. Just as you allow the body to become still, accepting any unfinished project of trying

[00:05:35] to attain the perfect position, let your mind become still in the same way. Do not try to change or fix your mind, but rather accept what is coming up in your mind and trace it back to the awareness of the thought, the witnessing presence to whom the

[00:05:56] thought occurs. Little by little, that witnessing presence will occupy a greater portion of your awareness than your thoughts. Try to remain unmoving if possible. Of course, if you need to move, give yourself permission to do so at any time.

[00:06:20] Just make sure that you are conscious of any movements, no unconscious movements. Allow your eyes to gently close and feel the cares and worries of the day drain out of you as you take a deep breath in through your nose and exhale out your mouth.

[00:06:52] Again, inhaling through the nostrils, notice a pause at the top of the breath, and then exhale through the mouth once more when you feel ready. Inhale, slight pause, exhale. Allow one or two beats longer for the exhale. Notice a pause at the bottom of the breath.

[00:07:25] Go on breathing normally. If you have to breathe through your mouth, feel free, but if possible, breathe only through the nostrils. Breathe in, breathe out. Breathe in, breathe out. Continue on for a few moments. What you focus on expands.

[00:11:09] When you allow your attention to flow in the direction of the thoughts themselves, overthinking occurs. By pointing your attention elsewhere, the thoughts may still arise, but they begin to fade into the background. Shift your awareness to the witnessing presence within you, the part of you that simply observes

[00:11:39] without judgment. This presence is always there, quietly witnessing your thoughts, feelings, and sensations. Imagine yourself as a calm observer, watching your thoughts like clouds passing through the sky. You are not your thoughts, you are the awareness behind them.

[00:12:11] The sky is your consciousness, the being to whom the thoughts occur, the witness. The clouds are just the weather. Thoughts come and go. Sense the quiet stillness that resides beyond the thoughts. That quiet stillness, that witnessing presence is a much more enduring aspect of who you are.

[00:12:45] It is much nearer to the truth of who you are than the transient movements of your mind. Breathe in, breathe out. Continue on, allowing any thoughts that arise to simply fall away with the exhales.

[00:16:27] Sitting at the top of your head, gently scan your body for any areas of tension or discomfort. As you become aware of these areas, imagine sending your breath to them, softening and releasing the tension.

[00:16:50] Move slowly down your body, from your forehead to your eyes, your jaw, neck, and shoulders. Continue this process down your arms, chest, abdomen, hips, legs, and feet. Allow each part of your body to become heavy and relaxed, sinking deeper into your bed. Breathe in, breathe out.

[00:20:06] Bring your full attention to your breath. Feel the cool air entering your nostrils and the warm air leaving your body. If your mind begins to wander, gently bring your focus back to the sensation of your breath.

[00:20:29] With each inhale, feel a sense of calm entering your body, and with each exhale, release any stress or tension. Inhale calm, exhale stress. Inhale calm, exhale stress. Inhale calm, exhale stress. Choose a deliberate thought, something positive.

[00:22:20] Allow your attention to brood on that thought, pouring your mental attention toward this deliberate thought. Go on brooding on this deliberate thought. Brooding, brooding, brooding. Go on brooding, brooding, brooding. And then suddenly, in an instant, dash it out. Remain in that place of no thought for a while.

[00:23:31] After some time, a thought will spontaneously arise. When a thought spontaneously arises, once again pour your attention toward this thought, and go on brooding, brooding, brooding on this spontaneous thought. Go on brooding, brooding, brooding. Then suddenly, dash it out. Now stay in this place of no thought.

[00:24:24] As soon as a thought appears, dash it out. If the thought appears as an image, then as soon as it arises, let it dissolve like watercolors on a canvas and remain in that state of no thought. You have the ability to bring your mind into stillness.

[00:27:55] The mind has a natural ability to quiet itself. It isn't as easy as keeping your body still. The mind is very subtle. It's as subtle as dust on a table. Imagine as you breathe slowly in and out through your nostrils, that your breath causes

[00:28:26] your mind stuff to move just a little. If your breath, which is relatively calm and quiet now, can cause the mind to move in a subtle way, imagine how much more the mind stuff will wiggle when incessant thoughts continuously vibrate.

[00:28:53] In The Dao De Qing, another insightful book on the nature of the mind, the author, Lao Tzu, asks us if we have the patience to wait until the mud settles and the water is clear.

[00:29:10] When our attention has something relatively stable to focus on, the mud begins to settle. It takes some concentration to keep your attention pointed in a single direction. When we become very curious about who is thinking, who is watching, who is witnessing, this very inquiry has a stabilizing effect.

[00:29:42] The thoughts no longer preoccupy the attention, and the question itself becomes the object of concentration. The mud gradually settles. The water becomes clear. Picture yourself standing beside a clear, tranquil lake. The surface is smooth, like a mirror, reflecting the sky above.

[00:30:13] In your hands, you hold a small jar filled with water and mud. Gently, you shake the jar, mixing the mud with the water, creating a swirling, cloudy mess. This jar represents your mind, filled with thoughts, emotions, and distractions.

[00:30:41] As you hold the jar, notice how the mud swirls chaotically, making the water unclear. This represents the times in our lives when we feel overwhelmed, restless, or impatient. Now, imagine setting the jar down on a flat surface.

[00:31:07] As it rests, the mud begins to settle slowly to the bottom. The mud represents the activity of your mind. With time and stillness, it naturally sinks to the bottom, leaving the water clear and calm. There's no need to force it or rush it.

[00:31:38] It happens on its own, given time and patience. Breathe in. Breathe out. Breathe in. Breathe out. Breathe in. Breathe out. Continue. Allow yourself to settle, just like the mud in the jar. With each breath, feel a wave of relaxation washing over you, bringing you deeper into

[00:33:21] a state of peace and tranquility. Remember that patience is a gentle, powerful force. Just as the mud settles when left undisturbed, your mind can find clarity and calm when you give it the space and time it needs.

[00:33:45] By being a witness to your thoughts rather than a participant, you can overcome the habit of overthinking. Imagine the clear water in the jar as a symbol of the inner calm that is the essence of your being.

[00:35:10] It's always there, beneath the surface, waiting for the mud to settle. With patience, you can access this calm clarity no matter how chaotic things may seem. By simply witnessing your thoughts without attachment, you allow them to pass more freely, reducing the cycle of overthinking.

[00:35:43] As thoughts arise, try not to attach to them. Simply let them come and go. Don't hold onto anything. If you must hold onto something, hold onto the witnessing presence. Ask yourself, who is thinking? Don't worry about finding an answer.

[00:36:17] The question is what will help you transcend the thinking mode. Breathe in, breathe out. In this moment, embrace the stillness. Allow your mind and body to settle completely, just as the mud settles in the jar.

[00:40:00] Feel the gentle embrace of sleep approaching, bringing with it the promise of a new day filled with clarity and calm. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep.